Mr. Friedman, when you said Bibi’s standing ovation was bought and paid for by the Israel lobby, they called you a self-hating Jew. Sometimes they call me a self-hating Jew. How does one know when one is a self-loving Jew? How can one distinguish a self-loving Jew from someone who is just a wanker?
Mr. Friedman, back in February you wrote that “Egypt today has only two predators: poverty and illiteracy.” Now that the scary-sounding Muslim Brotherhood’s Mohamed Morsi has beaten Twitter to become Egypt’s next president in a democratic election, can we introduce a third?
Helena Merriman goes on the trail of Egypt’s secret police files to find out the stories of those whose names were listed in them and to find out whether the files - now in the possession of the new state security police - will ever be made public.
Mr. Friedman, I have a question for you about professionalism. I’m sitting in a panel at a journalism conference. What is the proper etiquette on using your iPhone as a mirror when performing the feminine arts?
Mr. Friedman, Google Maps tells me it should only take 21 minutes to get from where I live to where I was born, but it didn’t ask if I was Palestinian before calculating the travel time. Can you please email Larry Page and ask him to add roughly six and a half decades to this algorithm? Thanks for everything you’ve done for us.
Mr. Friedman, I just broke my vase to get rid of the rancid water inside, as you suggested. But now my vase is broken and there is rancid water all over my kitchen floor. Also, the vase was a very valuable family heirloom. What did I do wrong?